Comfort August 5, 2010

I’m kind of having “blogger’s block” right now so I decided to try another Plinky Prompt .

I decided on What’s your favorite comfort food, and why?

Ironically, I was thinking about doing a post about this yesterday, as I was in need of some comfort food this week. I’ll give you the back story first. Monday morning I had my yearly gyno appointment. Always so fun because my doctor continuously reminds me of how overweight I am. This time he did not, thankfully. However, he found a lump/mass in my breast and wanted me to get a mammogram and ultrasound on it asap. I held it together pretty well as he was telling me about his youngest patient to have breast cancer and the amounts of people who have had cancer recently. Even made it through making the appointment with the receptionist. Got out the door and started walking to the car and the flood gates opened. Every possible worse case scenario started running through my head. My kids growing up with out me. My husband doing life without me by his side. My parents having to bury me first ( I’d be cremated btw but thats off subject). So one else raising my kids. Etc Etc Etc… I called Louie when I got in the car and couldn’t even form a coherent thought much less get the words out. When I finally managed to tell him, he was so supportive and encouraging. He offered to take off work to go with me to the appointment, if you know Louie this is huge because he hates taking time off work. I drove straight to my moms because I needed comfort. I was supposed to go do a cleaning job right after but couldn’t pull it together, I’m still shocked I even made it to my moms safely. My mom and her husband were also very supportive and encouraging and prayed with me and for me through out the day. I was kind of in depression mode for most of the day. Sat on the couch listening to music all day when I came across my cousin’s friend Karla Davis ‘s version of Temporary Home by Carrie Underwood. It hit me… obviously I don’t want to die. I don’t want to leave my loved ones behind. I don’t want to miss all the important things in the lives of my kids… but this is my temporary home. If it is in God’s plan for me to leave and enter my real home then so be it. I had to let go of the fear and give it all to him and trust that whatever the results, it was HIS plan. Coming to this realization did not make me any less terrified, just gave me some peace I guess.

Anyway, before any of this happened on Monday my mom invited us for dinner at her house, but I couldn’t because I have started a coaching gig at JCS and had open gym that night. She ended up taking out some of her home made spaghetti sauce for me to take home and heat up for the family while I went to the gym. My kids love love love spaghetti and ate huge portions of it! For me, coming home and eating my mom’s spaghetti was one of the biggest comforts of my day. She has made some tweaks to her recipe since I was a kid but nevertheless it tasted like “home”. I can’t even describe how it makes me feel, I just love it and could eat it all day every day. I could eat it cold or hot, with our with out noodles. It doesn’t matter.

I went for my mammogram and ultrasound early Tuesday morning. The ladies were so so so nice and made me feel very comfortable through a pretty intense and scary situation. And even they are not supposed to tell me any of the results they both told me that it looked like nothing to worry about just some built up tissue and that the doctor would call and confirm these results in a day or two.

Sure enough, I got the call yesterday morning that the tests came back clear and I would not have to get a biopsy. But that they would like me to come back in a month to recheck everything to make sure. Praise GOD! After taking Trey to his 1st dentist appointment (that lasted about 2 hours, UGH), we came home and I indulged in some more of my comfort food. Boy, did it hit the spot! I can eat it in happy times, in sad times, in scary times or in times of celebration.

What’s your comfort food?

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